Dive In, Get Dirty, And Smell Good!

I don’t know why I remember it so vividly. It was the first week of Kindergarden. I was still silently feeling a bit uneasy in my new surroundings. I remember that we were all seated at what seemed like an unusually long table, as the teacher handed out supplies.I remember the teacher reaching over the table and handing it to me. And there it was....in all its infinite possibilities....that golden box of Crayola crayons. Flat, wide and weighty in my hand, it glistened, almost glowed, with the perfection of it’s pristine condition. I slowly lifted the thick protective cover to reveal 8 of the most perfect crayons, no doubt, in all the Universe. They were huge! Well it was Kindergarden, after all. We would need industrial sized crayons. And they were the kind with the hard wax, for the ultimate coloring experience!I was in love. I quickly looked to my right and thought to myself, “Quentin better keep his mits off  my crayons!” And then I got an idea. I gently picked up each crayon, and behind it’s position in the box, I carefully drew a thin vertical line about the third of the length of each crayon. This way, I could preserve the original order the crayons came in (?!@#??) , AND I’d be able to tell if Quentin or anyone else touched, or God forbid used, my crayons. Disturbing, yes.I loved using those crayons. Though eventually, preserving them became an obstacle between myself and my beloved. I now recognize this to be a fear-based action. I was afraid I would use the crayons all up, that they would get damaged, that somehow I’d be without that brand new box of perfect crayons. I didn’t realize at the time that the joy of those crayons could only be experienced while engaged in heavy duty use.Out of the blue, as I sat down at my desk this morning, I remembered that day in Kindergarden so vividly. I recognized this as a sign post. As soon as I acknowledged it, the realization shouted to me, “Go burn all the good candles! Go wipe your hands on the good towels in the bathroom! Have breakfast on the holiday dishes and for God’s sake, use your special perfume everyday! Dive in, get dirty, and smell good dammit!”Today, I hope you use your crayons in reckless glory! I know I will. ;)